It had been a lovely day, bright and warm enough. The evening settled snuggly in and the air remained comfortable. Slowly, our friends began to materialize. Barcrofters first of course. The ladies all in black, the men in various stages of dapper dressing. The bar was open, the food was being passed and the bass in Kesha's latest song thumped in the background. Tim was forty and we were celebrating.
I thought I would know more by now. Tim is forty and I am thirty-nine. I thought we would feel more responsible, more mature. There we were, after midnight, in a bar.... as I danced Tim threw back shots. Really? This is where we are? Of course, THIS is not every Friday night. Still.
We pay bills, and taxes. We lease cars and make tuition payments. We change the air filters in our homes and have regular dental check ups. Yet, where is the wisdom? Where is the knowledge that I thought I would possess by now?
I still use acne medication. I've been known to swear like a sailor and drink like a fish. I still like to match my shoes with my outfit.
As the evening wore on, I weaved in and out of conversations and collections of friends... work friends, college buddies, neighbors, confidantes. These are the people who know us best. What did they think of a 40 year old Tim doing shots? Me, outdancing twentysomethings.... are we where we are supposed to be by now?
When I wake up and feel old enough, will it be too late? And for what?
1 comment:
It was a great evening... and what keeps you more young than doing shots and outdancing twentysomethings!? You are more wise than you know.
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